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WHAT'S NEXT FOR SARAH PALIN?

Now that Alaska Governor Sarah Palin has announced her resignation, what will she do next?

Some possibilities, whether you love her or hate her:

  • Publish a tell-all memoir finally admiting that all the rumors that surfaced about her during the campaign were true, and that even she thought John McCain was too old to be president (but was okay with it because it meant that when the stress of the job finally got to him she could take over)
  • “Late Night with Sarah Palin” — David Letterman once gave Tom Snyder a show, so why not? Besides, Dave’s a professional comedian and what could be a bigger joke than to pass his show on to her?
  • Join forces with John McCain for “Mavericks” motivational speaking tour before being sued by Mark Cuban for trademark infringement
  • Pose nude for Playboy, but then defend her actions by saying that because naked bodies come from God there’s nothing sinful about showing them
  • Become a personal shopper at Neiman Marcus
  • Sign lucrative endorsement deal with Lenscrafters to promote line of glasses
  • Sign lucrative endorsement deal with Mattel to promote line of Caribou Barbie Dolls
  • Sign lucrative endorsement deal with Democratic Party to promote the Republican Party, because they finally realize the only way to destroy the GOP completely is from within
  • Move back to Wasilla, become full-time hockey mom
  • Take her ability to tireless promote lost causes and become new C.E.O. of G.M.
  • …or Chrysler
  • …or for that matter, the Republican Party
  • Sign deal with the producers of “Jon and Kate plus 8” to create yet another cable TV show about a large, dysfunctional family
  • Print 500,000 posters of herself holding a rifle and wearing a camouflage hunting outfit and then crisscross the country autographing it for $5 a shot at gun shows, NRA meetings and country fairs
  • Open a day care
  • Move back to Wasilla, run for mayor again but lose, fade into obscurity
  • Become the 45th President of The United States

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